Just For Today, morning pages

Just for today, I will not be angry.
Just for today I will honor every living thing.
I will laugh and feel the freedom of choice and the power that this freedom of choice gives me.
Just for today I will be full of gratitude.
I will bless the things which come my way, and see the beauty of the gifts that are brought into my life.
Just for today I will not worry.
I will love and live and feel the breath of life rush through my lungs and body. I will endevor to fill my mind and soul and heart with joyful life energy.
Just for today I will seek out the adventure and live a life that suits my inner/higher/wider/deepest self. And I will have fun doing this.

Just for today I will feed myself a diet of enjoyment, cut out the guilt and the stress. That should make everything taste better. ;)

Just for today I will do my work honestly.

So far this morning, I've been doing well. Only 1 cigarette, and I made Etienne breakfast. Right now I'm sitting here with red goo on my head, waiting for my time to run out. I don't know if I should have stuck with the same as always, but I do like the colour. And Etienne himself did say that red would make my hair "pop". Can't be anything wrong with that now can there?

See, I want a look that is energizing, light, fun. It's not about being admired though, its really about my own philosophy in the work I want to do. If I am giong to run this center -

Woah... can you believe I just said "If I am going to"?? What is that about? Ok Me- listen- there is not a shadow of a doubt that I will be running this center. I don't know why in the world you think there is a maybe, but I know that I will, am and can. so Ha Ha Ha, nice try.

Anyway.... about my look- the philosophy I'm working with is about energy. It's about bringing people back to life and waking them up to their potentials and power. So with that in mind, I'm throwing out the window the "safe" pastel colours of traditional counselling offices. I want people to walk into the office and feel rejuvinated and more awake- empowered. So I've decided to go for vibrant and full of life force. So hair, well, I'm just going to style it according to my mood- and how the energy flows on any given day. Follow the energy lines. That may be a bit tricky until I get used to it, but the day before yesterday I had it perfect, and then yesterday I tried to impose the previous day's style on it and it rebelled on me.

So I have to not try to make it conform to my "idea" of what is right, but just follow the energy itself and see what happens.

What about clothing/Style?

Um.... I am having a bit of trouble with this. I don't want to get stuck in a rut... don't want to wear clothes to outragegous.... But dont want to be totally conformed to the "long flowing clothing" look that a lot of spiriutal practitioners use. I mean I want to cross between the rave style, something really classic and simple, and the flowing loose clothing. Can't i have it all?

I want to be comfortable all the time, and mobile and look good. And I don't want to go to people's houses or visit other businesses and have them feel underdressed because of how dressed up I am. I also don't want to be a mess/slob myself.

Make up is the easy one... not much of it. Really don't want to look over processed. I want to look fresh and clean and emphasize my eyes, to make it easier for people to see the "real" me.

Accessories... um, see clothing.

I want my mood/energy when I'm working with people to be able to alternate between the childlike exhuberance and bubbliness, and the calming soothing person I can be, the edgy opinionated expressive self, and the soft sensitive caring self. I want to be able to hold somone's had and sit quietly with them when they need to be comforted, and be able to jump into a happy dance (and really mean/feel it) when I walk out the door into a more loud/energized experience.

I guess I have to be a bit of a chameleon then, changing depending on the need/situation/group.

However.... I must always remember that the Chameleon doesn't actually change. Only the cloak does- only the skin changes. The essential self, shape and size and so on stays the same.

Totem for today, the chameleon. For the third eye, and for the power to adapt to situations regardless of how difficult.

So, my red hair has to be about ready... I am going to go have one last cigarette before I let my roots show.

Maybe next time I'll go for a light red-blonde/something really bright.... hmmmm.... Not a bad idea.

Great day to go out and talk to people.
Just for today Iw ill not worry about what people think of me, I will bring myself fully to the situation and not stress about their interpretation of my selfness.