What I have been through deserves a voice- I deserve to know that my own experiences have as much value as anyone else's. That I am as important as the world. That I am the world.
I can not justify or explain something to you that is only relevant to me.
I'm tired of pretending that I'm ok and framing everything in a positive sense, when that is not how I feel. I know, beyond a shadow of a doubt that negative energy/feelings/experiences held in the body make one ill... I'm not going to lie about being where I'm at.
Each person's process is different, and I am truly not prepared to defend what's happening and where I'm at, (even as I try to) because on some level I don't believe I should have to. After all, it's my life, my time here, my space and time and truth. Where did I sign away my own right to choose unhappiness and happiness, to express the truth of who I am in all ways?
If I were a reflection of the world as it is now... how would you treat me? The same? I'm not attacking you- I seriously would like to know. Because as I am emerging from my darkness and when I begin to attract light, I want to be surrounded by those who treat me the way they would treat the world they live in. And I'm not going to be willing to accept less from any of you than love, both for yourself, the world and for me. I will still love you no matter what, but when it is time to change all things, I will want to know how you would approach that change. How you approach me is going to teach me a lot in the next little while. And if you don't, because you can't handle where I'm at, what I say or who I am truly and honestly, then to hell with you. :) But I will still love you even then.
But right now I have to learn how to love myself.
Love always
In all ways
Anime
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